sunset days

yeah, I taste the lingering stupidity of
my words
they sit in the air
as if perched on a tree branch, never coming
down again

embarrassment over
nonsense

it's nothing, really
but it's something, too

something heavy

tangled heart
bruised loneliness
mixed feelings
ardent hope

this don't feel good

nothing to comfort me as I let the weight settle on
my chest
this overindulgence in shame and it's
pinning me to the floor and I can't
I can't get up

(just ignore this
something heavy)

you can pretend to not be ashamed

but can't they all see through me? there it sits
on my chest
perched and lingering
swinging its legs as it settles onto the familiar
supportive branch

"get off," I say
but it's as much a part of me as my lungs

my lungs which
gave breath to my stupid words hanging in the air and which
feed me every day

it's silly that I feel exposed when I walk around
when really
no one is even looking at me

hey, I don't need more attention
I provide it abundantly for myself already
(just to say, this is no pity cry)

I think I'll
get up and walk anyways
even if it's heavy

burdens are a part of these sunset days